Song Parodies -> "Kevin, The Provo Gunman"

Original Song Title:

"Rudolph, The Red Nosed Reindeer"

Original Performer:

"Kevin, The Provo Gunman"

Parody Written by:

The Lyrics

You don't hear much out of Northern Ireland these days. Which, all things considered, is good news. A few years back there was an agreement in which the Irish Republican Army put its weapons "beyond use", whatever that might mean. Most of the Irish people, Protestant and Catholic want peace and democratically elected government. But, there will always be a few holdouts who can't seem to accept an end to violence.

You know Casement and Collins and Pearse and MacDonagh
Plunkett and Broy and Eamon DeValera
But do you recall, the most famous rebel of all?

Kevin, the Provo gunman
Chose to live a sniper's live
Death was his contribution
To the Northern Ireland strife

All of the I R A men
Marveled at his marksman's skill
With every shot expended
He would score another kill

Then one foggy Saint Pat's eve
HQ came to say
Kevin, with your Armalite*
Won't you slay the Queen tonight

That's when the Brits reacted
Fifty thousand on his head
Kevin, the Provo gunman
"Bring him in, alive or dead"!

Chief Inspector, Scotland Yard
Offered a reward
Fifty Thousand Sterling Pounds
Not a sum to be ignored

Soon all the SAS men
Hot upon poor Kevin's trail
Kevin, the Provo gunman
He's now serving life in gaol

Life inside an English gaol

Provo: Provisional Irish Republican Army, a violent organization. *Armalite: An American made rifle, popular with the IRA. Gaol: British spelling of "jail". SAS: Special Air Service, a British commando unit, sometimes deployed in Ulster to fight the IRA.

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Barry J. Mitchel - March 17, 2014 - Report this comment

Being a USA native, I don't know any of those men in your intro; but today I'll research them. 5s

Rob Arndt - March 17, 2014 - Report this comment

I like-555! The SAS had been in Ulster since 1969 and had both high profile ambush units and undercover spies to reign in IRA ASU operations. They started off by intercepting arms and identifying leadership and then picked them off, sometimes with collateral damage. The SAS was accused of a "shoot on sight" policy by the public and liberal media but was found to have used deadly force in accordance within the ROE. They even stopped the IRA from a Gibralter incident in 1988, killing the IRA team sent there. As for PIRA, many of them died too or were captured. I don't know right off which Kevin you refer too! But as for the AR-15/M-16, it was their weapon of choice and is featured on their home flags. Several came from stolen US armory stocks abroad. There was also an incident with the IRA using a stolen M-60, truck-mounted...

Leough - March 17, 2014 - Report this comment

555 - Excellent work here! It seems that all the divided countries prove "trouble"-some. e.g. Korea, Viet Nam, even the US a long time ago. Now we might have to add Ukraine to that list.

Jonathan - March 17, 2014 - Report this comment

Happy St. Patty's Day Laddie! 5's

Patrick - March 17, 2014 - Report this comment

Kevin is just a generic Irish name I chose because it fit the pacing. As for divided countries, it appears Scotland and Quebec are agitating for independence again. Fortunately, I expect such separation, if it happens, to be peaceful.

An Englishman - March 17, 2014 - Report this comment

At least until the Good Friday Agreement, when he'll be let out with the rest.

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